This is going to sound so stupid and all over the place and maybe it’s just because I’m running off of two RedBulls and a couple of cookies but I have forgotten how much I love writing. All of my writing for the last few months, in all honesty, has been really depressing. It’s mainly due to the fact that I have been depressed and in this weird limbo area between good and bad for the past year, somewhat due to quarantine but also because of my own brain chemical. As I’ve been finishing up my college apps and preparing for the new year, I have actually begun to feel excited for the future. I don’t want to jinx it, but I genuinely think I am excited for the next year. Not because I think it’ll be this amazing year that I’ll remember forever, but because it’s new and it’s something tangible I can look forward to. But back to my main focus of my rekindled love for writing (I said this was going to be a bit of a mess). I love writing forever and always, but I have felt so uninspired lately to the point that writing has felt like a chore. I haven’t been able to get into that zone I crave so often, the one where I lose all track of time and just get lost in the words filling up the page. I think (again I don’t want to jinx myself) I am getting back to that place where I am good and I am inspired and I can feel the emotions run from my heart to my fingertips. Maybe that’s why this whole post is a bit of a mess. I am a mess but I’m happyish and I am inspired and I am writing and that’s all that matters to me.
Just let this be a reminder that you will feel good again, I promise.